A Mother of a Leader

Leader Mom

Have you hugged a leader today?

This past Mother’s Day weekend, I thought a lot about the joy I have with my children, as well as the blessings I have received from my own mother. Mothers have a deep sense of pride in what we do. We want to do it well because we sense that the impact our efforts will shape the lives of our children forever.

When I think about the responsibilities of being a mother, they are great. Often, they are synonymous with the characteristics of outstanding leadership. Think of the parallels:

Mothers and leaders must be inspirational and visionary.

They can’t waste energy on obstacles, difficult situations, and “I can’t.” Instead, they must forge ahead – goal-oriented – breaking barriers with optimism and encouragement, showing their family that creative solutions can bring success. Moms are problem-solvers, out-of-the-box thinkers who want to push the limits and provide for their children. In a sense, weren’t Moms the first entrepreneurs?

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Remember the inspiration she gave you so that you had the belief you could do anything? Even before the words “entrepreneur” or “inspiration” existed, mothers had paved the way by bringing us into this world and providing a vision of how great our lives can be! Likewise, leaders should inspire to bring out the best in their teams. They should encourage and support fresh, new ideas, be ready to take some calculated risks, and celebrate the rewards of taking their organizations to new and exciting places.

Mothers and leaders add value by serving others.

As stated by John Maxwell in The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership “the bottom line in leadership isn’t how far we advance ourselves but how far we advance others.”

From the day you were born, you mother nurtured you, supported you, and sacrificed for your well being. Yes, mothers often put the needs of their children ahead of their own….and they do so to build into them and give them the greatest tools, abilities, and methods to achieve success. “What can I do for you?” is a commonly used phrase. That’s leadership at its finest!! An organizational leader should be sure they are empowering their team, giving credit where credit is due, and being generous by sharing his/her time, knowledge, and resources.

Mothers and leaders must be able to connect emotionally to others.

Primal Leadership: “Even if they get everything else just right, if a leader fails in this primal task of driving emotions in the right direction, nothing they do will work as well as it could or should.”

Think of a time in your life when you felt emotionally hurt and you shared that with your mom. She made you feel better, didn’t she? Moms are not only good listeners, but they have a way of knowing just the right thing to say to help you move forward in a better direction. Moms acknowledge their children, express empathy and connection, and then they leave you with a sense that you can do better next time. Leaders should also realize that their emotions are contagious. If they resonate positive energy and enthusiasm, it will likely rub off on their teams. That emotional connection may take everything else to the next level.

Mothers and leaders must know when to lead and when to let go.

John Maxwell writes “Good leaders recognize that when to lead is as important as what to do and where to go. Timing is often the difference between success and failure in an endeavor.”

The greatest responsibility of parenting is raising our children to be the best they can be…out on their own. It’s years of building into them to let them go and flourish. Throughout their childhood, they need their mom’s guidance, love, and support. We must lead them….and we must let go – just like that spectacular moment when you let go for your child’s first two-wheeled bicycle ride. Moms must lead when needed and let go when needed. The same is true for great leadership. There are times to step up and lead, and there are times to allow others to do the work. There are times when decisive actions need be taken, and a good leader knows how to identify these and make them happen.

There are many likenesses, indeed, between mothers and leaders. And in fact, yes, mothers ARE leaders in many respects. The biggest differentiating factor, however, is that a mother’s love is deeper, more passionate, protective, and joyful than any business can bring. While we can enjoy our careers and business leadership, the fact remains that no earthly act is more gratifying than being a mother and being loved in return by your children. That unconditional emotion can inspire even the greatest of all leaders.

Have you experienced a leader who possessed the attributes of a great mother? How did it impact your performance? How have you taken the example provided by a great mom and demonstrated that to your team? If you have, how did they react? I would love to hear an example of maternal leadership that has paid off in real results with your team! Please share.

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Erin Schreyer is the Owner and Managing Partner of Sagestone Partners, LLC.
She can be reached at [email protected].
Image Source: wahmbreakcafe.com

L2L Contributing Author

18 Comments

  1. Becky Robinson on May 12, 2009 at 9:02 am

    Great post, Erin. I wrote about a similar topic on a new leadership blog, LeaderTalk, this weekend. Your readers may enjoy checking out my series:

    http://mountainstate.typepad.com/leadership/2009/05/leadership-lessons-from-mom-part-2.html
    http://mountainstate.typepad.com/leadership/2009/05/leadership-lessons-from-motherhood-.html



  2. Leslie Clark on May 12, 2009 at 3:19 pm

    Loved this post! I myself find that as my skills and approach to being a mother change as my son grows, so does my attitude towards management.



    • Erin Schreyer on May 12, 2009 at 4:52 pm

      Thanks, Leslie! Great perspective!! I know what you mean!!



  3. Yvonne Sum on May 12, 2009 at 8:29 pm

    Loved this post! I am passionate about Parent Leadership – and what you have written totally is on the same wavelength. This is a model I do use in Executive Coaching where the metaphor of Parent Leadership is contextualized to the business world. Like you, my best teachers that I partner my leadership learning are my parents and my two children of the wise age of 8 and 10! Check out my website on Transformational Leadership Challenge – on just this topic!



    • Erin Schreyer on May 13, 2009 at 9:31 am

      Thank you for your reinforcement!! I just went to your website – very nice! We think alike!!!



  4. BlueRain on May 12, 2009 at 8:32 pm

    Interesting parallel, nice post.



  5. Donna Ginn on May 13, 2009 at 11:25 am

    This is a very interesting comparison and there is probably some truth to it. However, we should be very cautious about comparing what leaders and managers do in a corporate setting to what mothers and fathers do in a home. Why cautious? Well, if it is true that our behavior is guided by deeply held values and beliefs, you have to ask the question does this model fit when your employees are racially and ethnically different from the leader/manager; or whose sexual orientation is different?



    • Erin Schreyer on May 14, 2009 at 8:00 am

      A valid question, Donna. I think that’s where the element of emotional intelligence comes into play. Both mothers and leaders need to be able to “read their audience” accurately and react accordingly. It’s great that you clearly show a sensitivity to this area. I’m sure those in your community value that in you.



      • Donna Ginn on May 14, 2009 at 5:42 pm

        Thanks Erin,
        I certainly hope they value me. I value all that I have learned since
        moving to one of the most diverse communities in America …. Miami.
        Donna



  6. Leslie Kohler on May 13, 2009 at 4:29 pm

    Beautifully crafted. You speak with skill, eloquence and in-the-trenches knowledge!

    Leslie Kohler
    TheSeminarCopywriter.com



    • Erin Schreyer on May 14, 2009 at 7:54 am

      Thanks so much for your kind words, Leslie. I’m really glad you enjoyed it! Keep coming back!!



  7. Aashish Dabral on May 14, 2009 at 3:58 am

    Profound. I know that this post will be life altering for me and of course my children. I only thought of the as my kids and never thought in this manner. Thank you very much.



    • Erin Schreyer on May 14, 2009 at 7:52 am

      Aashish, I’m so touched by your comments. You ARE a leader, with one of the most important jobs on the planet!! I’m glad that you found inspiration here. This is the greatest blessing of my job! Take care.



  8. A Mother of a Leader « Teaching and Learning on August 18, 2009 at 12:29 am

    […] May 13, 2009 by Debby from http://linked2leadership.com/2009/05/12/a-mother-of-a-leader/ […]



  9. Eone on January 16, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    Thanks Erin for sharing your thoughts. Keep up sharing with us. I do agree that mothers are leaders in their own right. I remember during my scholarship interview when the interviewer asked me about my mom’s job. Without hesitation, my answer to them ” domestic engineer ” lol



  10. […] For more Mother’s Day thoughts, revisit my posts from Mother’s Day 2009 or this outstanding reflection from Erin Schreyer, also posted in […]



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