Managing Mondays: How to Win an Argument

People often disagree; but why?

People have different thinking. I have my own thinking and I think it is right. Other people also believe in their own thinking, but it may not always be the same as me. So we talk to each other, but sometimes our conversations are intense. – Yoko, a YMCA first year English course student

What does it mean to argue anyway?

It means to contend or disagree in words giving reasons for or against something.

Why do it?

• To express your opinion on a matter.
• To prove a point getting your opponent to agree with you.
• For the sake of arguing.
• To maintain integrity.

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What are some reasons you argue?

Hopefully you are able to argue in a civilized manner exchanging structured points of view with others with a sense of decorum. But often times we become defensive and it becomes more about winning than expressing pertinent standpoints.

When this happens, little gets done but name calling (either spoken or not.)

This can be due to an underlying problem such as:

• Insecurity
• Jealously
• A general distaste for the opposing party

Can arguing be done more effectively?

According to Michael Gilbert in How To Win An Argument:

“In a creative argument both parties are more interested in finding the truth or solving the problem than in being right. When you argue creatively you are interested in your partner’s arguments, and you listen to them carefully to see if there is helpful information or insights. Your partner is also listening to you, and you work together to come up with the best solution or correct answer. Creative argument minimizes the role of the arguers’ egos and maximizes their commitment to inquiry.”

Although an argument may be unavoidable in many circumstances. I would recommend you have arguments for the suitable reasons so something conclusive can come of the discussion, improving your life and the lives of those around you.

Oh you don’t think so? Prove it!

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Jason Christensen is National Accounts Manager for The Stanley Works.
He can be reached at [email protected]

Image Sources: static.open.salon.com, causticconservative.com